Wondering?

Hey it's been a few days. I couldn't figure out what my topic was going to be.

So i have been going through somethings personally and professionally and i am starting to wonder...

• Will i get a break professionally?
• How will it happen?
• I am good enough?
• Will others think i am good enough?
• How do i show i am good enough?
• What can i do to show everyone i AM good enough?

and many more...

There are several things that are holding me back. MONEY being the biggest set back. How are you suppose to start a Photography business when you can't afford the equipment? I am using a dinky Kodak Easyshare ZD8612 IS camera. That takes moderate quality pictures.. sometimes. I want to get my Photography Certification but I can't find a School that i like and can afford at the same time. I have ideas and no clients steadily coming in to try them out on? Then when i have clients either my brain freezes or something i can't control happens. Like a child's mood swing.

I have been looking at a Panasonic Lumix DMC-G2 12.1 MP Live MOS Interchangeable Lens Camera with 3-Inch Touch Screen LCD and 14-42mm Lumix G VARIO f/3.5-5.6 MEGA OIS Lens (Shown Below)  through Amazon.com. For my future camera buy but i can't afford it. I know as soon as i get a wedding down payment that will be the first thing i purchase. How do i get a wedding?


I have done three weddings in the past and two were my own family. How do i spread my wings outside my family tree? The pictures i have taken in the past are not the pictures i want to take in the future. I have recently fell head over heels for Photojournalism style Photographers. I follow two of my favorite local photographers through facebook and blogspot. I want to post them on here and i don't because they are my competition.
I feel like i am putting myself out there too. I have business cards out hanging, a website up and running, facebook fan page, blog, twitter and word of mouth. I feel like i can't do any local advertising, One, because i am not licensed and Two, i don't have much of a portfolio to show yet. So what is a person suppose to do?

So what else can a person do? I have tried working with local photographers and getting  a foot in the door. Someone to teach me the ways of being awesome. Someone to show me the ropes. I know there are workshops out there and again they take money. It's like a vicious cycle.

So i guess i am just stuck here wondering?